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30 March 2008 @ 11:36 am
 
Title: Aphephobia
Rating: PG
Pairing: Matsumiya
Word Count: 1468
Notes: I participated in jentfic_remix, and this is the product; a remix of Touch by mrsatterthwaite. She seemed to like it, so I hope other people do, too. (Aphephobia, incidentally, is the fear of touching/being touched. Go figure, right?) Also, I'm back from my brief hiatus to Mexico for spring break - fic posting will resume as normal.



Casual touching is not something that Jun does much, if ever, unless you happen to be Leader. Jun may initiate a tap to get somebody’s attention, and he has no problem cuffing his band mates on the head when something particularly stupid is said or done, but a lingering arm around somebody’s waist is not in his repertoire. Jun will accept a bit of casual touching from the others during photo shoots and performances and may even touch a shoulder himself then, but otherwise he needs his space, and they know better than to try to take it away from him.

Nino has no problem with the casual touching. Nino touches all the time – often touching what should be inappropriate places, but the others have come to accept as fair game. What he won’t do is be sickeningly sweet and adoring, unless you happen to be Leader – or sometimes Aiba-chan. His mercurial moods won’t even let him accept someone being sickeningly sweet and adoring to him. His energy comes in fits and leaves him fidgety, desperate for release, which often translates to overly friendly punches that border on violent. He doesn’t dare touch Jun in such a mood.

Sometimes they still aren’t sure how they fell in together, or how they manage to still be together.

It’s not that Jun doesn’t want to touch Nino, because when they’re finally behind two locked doors with the window shades drawn he’ll do it gladly. It’s not that Nino doesn’t like Jun enough to maybe allow himself to be sweet and adoring a few times out of the year – and he has been known to pay for Jun’s meals occasionally.

But still, Jun takes a good three minutes to deliberate before taking Nino’s hand in his; and Nino takes as long before he’ll rest his head on Jun’s shoulder. In private. Neither will allow himself to touch in public, no matter how much either might want to, because neither can stand the thought of their relationship being likened to, say, Ohmiya SK.

More fans than any Arashi member cares to think about have already decided that Nino and Ohno buy each other teddy bears and whisper sappy things to each other at home, and teddy bears and flowers and cards on Valentine’s Day are not a part of Nino’s or Jun’s plans for each other (neither is a stern reprimand from the front office). Both are afraid that the one time they forget to maintain distance, they will be caught holding hands and voila: their entire relationship is reduced to exactly that in the eyes of the public twenty-four hours later (assuming Johnny doesn’t fire or suspend them first).

Not that either Nino or Jun want the fans knowing the more intimate details of their lives – if they want to think that Ohmiya SK is the One True Pairing then they’re welcome to – but their relationship is anything but simple.

Jun lives for those moments he can get with Nino when both are quiet, he himself perhaps reading a book while Nino sits pressed to his back and picking at his guitar. He savors these moments like the expensive French-made dark chocolates that Nino has gotten him for his birthday for six years running (he never has figured out how Nino learned of his weakness for them).

Nino, on the other hand, is thrilled to have a partner who will accept his banter for what it is, and give it back with as much enthusiasm (in spite of Sho’s insistence that verbal abuse is not good for them). He’d rather someone liken their relationship to purika booths, because there he can goad Jun into making ridiculous faces at the camera with him and actually relax for a while – teddy bears would just make Jun raise an eyebrow.

------

Their conversations leading up to dates usually go like this:

Nino will approach Jun in the middle of their work, maybe during a break. “Come over.”

Jun hardly even looks up from his book. “I can’t.”

“Yes you can, don’t give me that.”

“I really can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I’ve got a script to memorize.”

“You mean you’ve got more plans to work yourself to death before thirty.”

“Don’t you have anything to do?”

“I’ve got ‘annoy Matsujun’ written on my calendar, does that count?”

Jun rolls his eyes and says nothing.

“Look, I know you’re not really busy tonight and we’ll only wind up at the same office tomorrow anyway. So come over tonight, I’ll give you a massage and we can fuck. It’s a win-win situation from where I’m standing.”

Jun rolls his eyes, but he nods. He likes being chased, and Nino knows it, and not that he’ll ever admit it, but it’s kind of fun to be the chaser. It’s the only reason Nino hasn’t tried to kill Jun for making him do all the asking.

------

Following just such a conversation, it is after a night together and a breakfast date that Nino and Jun finally make the step towards changing their paparazzi-induced aphephobia. After breakfast together, they prepare to make their first commute as a couple. They’ve had commutes together in the sense that occasionally they’ve bumped into each other on a train platform or just in front of the doors to whichever studio they’re in for the day, and walked the rest of the way together – this is their first time going after spending the night together.

They board at a fairly early stop on the line, but it is just late enough that there are no seats available in their car, and neither are inclined to search through the train just to sit. Nino chooses to lean in a corner, if only for the extra space provided. Jun debates, because if he stands in front of Nino, it might look suspicious, but if he doesn’t, Nino will pout and Jun will probably go tumbling over someone’s foot as soon as the train stops. So Jun sighs and grabs hold of the railing over Nino’s head with one hand, half-smiling as he takes his place. Nino leans on his hands, legs spread for balance, looking up at Jun through his bangs. Jun firmly reminds himself that ruffling Nino’s hair will only call attention to them, and stops himself from doing so.

The train rumbles on down the line, and more and more people begin to fill the car. Newspapers, and briefcases and jackets slung over arms take up more space than exists, and Jun presses more and more against Nino, trying to shield him from the crowd, while trying not to press against him, just for that few inches of space between them. Nino obliges by straightening up until he’s flat against the train wall and can’t straighten any more, so Jun doesn’t complain when they brush chests under the swaying of the train or the jostling of the teenager standing next to them.

The train is filled far beyond what capacity it should have by the second to last stop. There is barely an inch between Jun and Nino, but Jun is steadfast in trying to keep it there. Nino has closed his eyes, head resting against the wall, perhaps trusting that Jun will prop him up if he starts to fall. His hair is falling into his eyes, and he is, frankly, adorable in the morning light.

There is barely an inch of space between him and Jun.

A man jostles into Jun, trying to make space for a few desperate commuters. Jun “loses” his footing. Or he really loses it. Jun himself isn’t quite sure which, and the detail isn’t important. His torso presses against Nino’s, so much that he’s half afraid he’ll suffocate the smaller man. He considers backing away if he can, and starts to look behind him to judge the distance, but stops dead when weight presses back against his chest.

Nino is watching Jun through half-closed eyes. Nino is leaning on Jun rather than the wall. This is entirely intentional. There is a large newspaper brushing Jun’s arm on one side, and a wall on his other. The man behind the paper could care less about two more commuters. Jun could care less about the man. He wraps his free arm around Nino’s waist, resting his hand on Nino’s hip like it belongs there, because it does. Nino is his to hold.

They stay like this for seven minutes, until the train reaches their stop, and as they wait for the car to empty enough that they can begin to move towards the doors. It is the smallest of changes – touching rather than standing about chewing on lips and running through long lists of consequences that detail exactly why they shouldn’t.

But it is their change, and it is all they need.
 
 
Current Mood: awakeawake
 
 
 
yuribabyyuribaby on March 30th, 2008 05:15 pm (UTC)
Aww! I'm not a big Jun/Nino fan at all, but this story was really sweet and kind of sad, too. Very well-written! Thanks for sharing!
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Jun grinvintage_belle on March 30th, 2008 06:01 pm (UTC)
Thanks for reading! It's always really gratifying to hear that people will read my stuff even if they don't like the pairing <3
stsatsumatsu on March 30th, 2008 05:55 pm (UTC)
awww, this relationship between those two, you described it very well! (i knew the ff by mrsatterthwaite, but it was a bit short, ne?)

i just love the situation in the train!

thank you~~
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Nino puppyvintage_belle on March 30th, 2008 08:11 pm (UTC)
I really liked the original one, but it was kind of short, which is why I wanted to remix and make it longer. Really the credit to describing their relationship goes to mrsatterthwaite - I just expanded it.

Thanks for reading <3
hakaru_moonchan: NinoxJunhakaru_moonchan on March 30th, 2008 06:58 pm (UTC)
that was really, most of the time Jun and Nino relatioship has too much roughtness but you were able to show a sweet moment for them, thank you for sharing your story.
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Aiba goldenvintage_belle on March 30th, 2008 08:44 pm (UTC)
Thanks for reading <3 As I said above, the credit for the relationship really goes to mrsatterthwaite - it was her concept. I just expanded on it.
yasu ka kazu: nino cutetrickylady on March 30th, 2008 09:14 pm (UTC)
I adore Matsumiya too much for words.
and thia was a lovely piece. <3

thank you so much for sharing.
if only the world would accept the wonder that is JunxNino. ♥
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Ninovintage_belle on March 31st, 2008 03:52 am (UTC)
Matsumiya is a pet favorite of mine, constantly fighting for second place with Sakumiya. However, I have sadly few ideas for writing it ;_; All the genius of this still goes to Mrsatterthwaite.

Thanks for reading!
yasu ka kazu: matsurai otptrickylady on March 31st, 2008 04:03 am (UTC)
oh, I love Sakumiya as well. (well..though Matsurai is always a favorite, because it's so rare...Glad that there's more recently though.)

aw~~ a shame you don't have more inspiration, you write them beautifully.

(bows) was a pleasure.
kind of suspicious: happy ll junlost_girl11 on March 31st, 2008 11:23 am (UTC)
because neither can stand the thought of their relationship being likened to, say, Ohmiya SK.

I think I've been waiting for a fic like this for a very long time. MatsuMiya was always close to my heart. Lovely fic! :D
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Nino in the photovintage_belle on March 31st, 2008 03:15 pm (UTC)
Thank Mrsatterthwaite for giving me the base to take it farther. Matsumiya and Aimiya are both sadly under-represented in the fandom - unfortunately I'm not particularly strong with either of those pairings as a writer.

Thanks for reading <3
namtann on March 31st, 2008 04:41 pm (UTC)
I can't believe I don't have Matsumiya icons ;A;

Totally in love with this. I love the original one, too. The perfect description for Jun and Nino relationship :D There are different kind of charms in long, detailed fic and short, brief one. And I really happy I could read it in both ways <3

“Don’t you have anything to do?”

“I’ve got ‘annoy Matsujun’ written on my calendar, does that count?”


Aww ♥

Also, I missed your fic. Glad you're back ^^
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Junvintage_belle on March 31st, 2008 06:13 pm (UTC)
I've only got the two, unworthy as they are, but if you like you're free to yoink either.

I'm really glad you liked it. It was actually a little daunting to remix the original, because I liked it so much, so I'm glad that I did it at least a little bit of justice.

Awww, thank you <3

Thanks for reading!
Turtle Power: chibimatsumiyaepunx99 on April 1st, 2008 03:54 am (UTC)
wow! this was very well written. the story flowed really nicely. you have to continue writing matsumiya...hehe
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Nino puppyvintage_belle on April 1st, 2008 02:29 pm (UTC)
Hopefully I'll have other ideas for them, instead of just remixing other people's :)

Thanks for reading!
rezq_23rezq_23 on April 1st, 2008 08:36 am (UTC)
You make it better than the original one.... Not the original one is bad, but I love the way you write your fic... Keep it up girl... I wanna read more fic from you... ^^
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Aiba chandeliervintage_belle on April 1st, 2008 02:38 pm (UTC)
I hardly think mine is any better than the original - the original has a charm in being short and succinct. Still, there will probably be more 'fic from me for a very long time, so no worries there.

Thanks for reading <3
shika: relax junshikalion on April 2nd, 2008 02:47 am (UTC)
*sighs happily* that was a lovely fic. i love matsumiya to bits and that was really sweet. i must thank mrsatterthwaite for the idea and you for remixing it into this lovely creation. i'm looking forward to your upcoming fics as well :D
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Matsumiya comfortvintage_belle on April 2nd, 2008 11:10 pm (UTC)
Thank you for reading it! I'm glad you enjoyed it <3
SundaeCone: defsundaecone on April 8th, 2008 01:14 am (UTC)
Not much of a matsumiya fan, but... I have to say that I love the little details thrown here and there. I dunno, something about those little things make me go giddy. XD
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Junvintage_belle on April 8th, 2008 03:52 am (UTC)
Thanks for reading it in spite of the pairing <3 Details are fun, aren't they? :D
..*~*dRagOnEtTe*~*...clarice_dragon on February 13th, 2009 01:44 pm (UTC)
i've always liked matsumiya.

thank you! <33
gempleegemplee on April 30th, 2009 06:04 pm (UTC)
u know i totally agree with you on why matsumiya do not touch in public. matsumiya aren't my OTP (juntoshi is) but they're my 2nd fave. i think this is awesome.
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Ohno hatvintage_belle on April 30th, 2009 10:41 pm (UTC)
Thank you! ♥
Carmencarmenw84 on August 12th, 2012 05:39 am (UTC)
I'm starting to get annoying, right? xD
I would start thinking "omg, who is this crazy girl???"

I find this fic real-ish, like you can tell how awkward they are, but yet so loving towards each other. ^^ <3
Elspeth Caoilfhionn Kincaide; called Elle: Arashi - Jun is prettyvintage_belle on August 12th, 2012 05:01 pm (UTC)
Thank you for saying so! I think by this time I'd gotten a little better feel for what Arashi might have been/are like. Though I suppose we can't ever actually know, haha.

(I hope you've read the original of this; I'd never have been able to write this if it wasn't for hers and it's really good!)